As Winter Withers

As Winter viciously holds out till it's last breath and casts even more of it's icy chill, on an already frostbitten Midwest, I find myself looking back on where I was this time last year. Last year was similarly cold, lasting past easter and reminding me how insane it is that any creature would want to live in Michigan when the snow starts falling. I think after about twelve, the whole sledding and snowball fight thing wears off and you are forced to consider the fact that it really is freaking freezing out doors. (Good start, already on a tangent.)

But anyway, I was still making trips every other weekend to East Lansing doing shows with Genesis Theory, and prolly around this time chilling at an after party that led me to get crushed by a Korean girl I was hollering at, and intern had me drinking 22's of asahi a lot faster than I should have, and having a therapy session with my home girl Cyn on her balcony. The night gets a lot more messed up and dramatized as my band mates exercised their inner-demons as well, but that is another story for anyone who's buying me pancakes or Chinese food, after a gig, to ask me about. (Cause I shouldn't put in print ish about my friends who may not be as comfrtable having their laundry left on the line for the neighbors to see.)

It just got me thinking that though nothing seems like it has changed yet, really, there has been some major change in my life! The people I hung out with weekly, outside of Pearson, are no where around. Skeeto's back in Nagoya, Aaron's in Ohio, Loomer is back in Tokyo area, and I haven't been to EL on a party kick in forever! Not to mention the fact that since Code of tha Cutz shutdown there wouldn't be a place to freestyle even if I wanted to blow off steam in EL anyway. But on the positive tip, I did start dating. (Crazy, I know.) But, even with these changes, I still feel the same.

I still wake up every morning hoping it will be the last morning I wake up and have to go to a job I hate that hardens me for future resilience. I honestly have to believe that there is a cosmic reason I'm going through these experiences. In my case I think I'm going to get a record deal. Even if it's me owning the label. So after working my three jobs, I go home and write. Or, I go home and design, or go home and draw. Or read, or surf the net, and on a blue moon play a video game from the early 90's. But everything is motivation. I'm trying to keep that creativity flowing without pause.

And, I trying to stay focused. I finish mastering my new demo this week. It'll be the first three tracks I've released in five months. I'm starting to get nervous, because this means that other tracks will follow, and if money stays right and Skeeto & Pearson keep making beats, I'm gonna have an album finished. And Albums need tours to sell them. And tours have shows. It's been over five months since I've even seen a show in a bar, much less performed. I haven't seen anyone [gt] used to tour with since the summer time. But somehow, I know I'm ready again. It's like a nervous laugh. You know it's ok, you're just not sure how things are going to go. (Makes no sense.) Anyway, I'm just saying this: I've been ghosting for a while. You haven't seen me, and you haven't heard me for a long time. But, I'm coming back and I'll need your support. I hope that you'll help me make this music thing right. Because like Obama wants to change politics, I want to make big changes in hip-hop.

I'll hit everyone up when the Singles hit the myspace and the new website is finished. Also, I'll tell you tour dates when we get the set list memorized.

I bow to those who are enlightened and those who will be enlightened in the future. 2's.